So, remember when I said I was working on a special gift for hitting 1,000 followers? Well, over the weekend, we hit 1,500! WAY past due for me to make good on that promise. So here you go- a free origami Cubie pattern to download and print! It’s designed to be folded using the traditional waterbomb base, with the heart faces overlapping and the white sections becoming flaps that get tucked in. Now you can resize it, give it battle damage, make it look however you like, and then take cubie pictures of your own!
Alright, this next test may involve trace amounts of time travel. So, word of advice: If you meet yourself on the testing track, don’t make eye contact. Lab boys tell me that’ll wipe out time. Entirely. Forward and backward! So do both of yourselves a favor and just let that handsome devil go about his business.
(Happy Season 8 Premier!)
Break one-nine. Big Box Cave Johnson here, hauling a freight shaker with a loada cold ones in the wagon down to Texarkana. I got twenty-eight hours to get this done, so I’m putting the hammer down. Anybody hearing this, shake the bushes and gimme your ten-twenty. Also, test subjects, I’ll be gone for twenty-eight hours, test on your own recognizance. I want to keep this channel clear, so do not use your CB radios. Cave Johnson, we’re over and out here.
Cave Johnson again, just a heads up, you are currently in a tiny test chamber floating around in my bloodstream. Remember, if you see a giant set of car keys, those are mine. Lab boys shrunk ‘em part way down before I could stop ‘em. No idea if it was for science or if they’re just having one on at ol’ Cave, but either way, if you don’t find those things pretty soon, I’m gonna have to call Triple A.
Before re-entering a relaxation vault at the conclusion of testing, please take a moment to write down the results of your test. An Aperture Science Reintegration Associate will revive you for an interview when society has been rebuilt.
Look at this! No rail to tell us where to go! OH, this is brilliant. We can go where ever we want! Hold on, though, where are we going? Seriously. Hang on, let me just get my bearings. Hm. Just follow the rail, actually.
Just hang in there for five more - What? Jerry, you can’t fire me for that! Yes, JERRY — OR, maybe your prejudiced worksite should have accommodated a nanobot of my size. Thanks for the hate crime, Jer!